I just called to say

I wrote for the Gloss today about missing the old school telephone. I complained endlessly about Smart Phones before at last giving in and getting an iPhone. You can fight the tide of technology for only so long before you just become the irritating person who refuses to get with the program already. And mostly I just hate how people whip them out in the middle of a conversation or play games on them instead of doing something wild like reading a book. Lately I find it hard to focus and miss the days of simpler technologies.

In a world where digital distractions are omnipresent, how do you unplug long enough to think straight?

a change gonna come

                                                                             you are here 

Oh goodness have I been a delinquent blogger. Can you ever forgive me readers? Perhaps you were on the beach these last couple of weeks instead of perusing the internets and didn't even notice my absence. If so welcome back, nice tan. I hope the only light you've seen during these dog days of summer hasn't been the sickly glow of your computer monitor but if it has fear not for I am about to inundate you with material for your internet reading and work procrastination needs shortly.

In the meantime, in case you missed it, I wrote for the Gloss last week about the Saturn Return and the massive transition I am in the middle of. Whether or not the supposed astrological phenomenon is a self-fulfilling prophecy doesn't really matter in the end I've decided. You have to take advantage of whatever momentum life gives you. 

Hope you're all feeling the wind in your sails with fall on the way, I have a feeling it's gong to be a good one.  

hello old friend

This past weekend I read through an old manuscript (more on why I did this soon). This experience is something like a combination of reading an old journal and meeting for drinks with an ex boyfriend you suspect you might still be in love with. Exciting, illuminating and all kinds of uncomfortable.

The question of when to let go is one that has probably plagued every writer ever. I know I was ready to let go of this one once before because my agent and I already shopped it to publishers three years ago. So now the question is, do I still trust my twenty six year old self to make that decision on the behalf of my twenty nine year old self?

How do you know when it's time to let go?

fear

I wrote for the Gloss today about trying to conquer my fears. I had an epiphany while brushing my teeth on Monday morning and then just as quickly started trying to talk myself out it. More to come on what that epiphany entailed but it seemed like either the thing I'd been waiting for or a totally harebrained idea. I told two friends about it right away before my fear could chase it away and they agreed it was the former.

What have you talked yourself out of doing lately?

the FOMO

                                               you wouldn't want to miss the chinchillas in party hats 

You know the FOMO. The FOMO keeps you from your sleep, makes you get into heels and mini-dress (or whatever the male equivalent of that get-up is) when you feel like being on the couch in you pajamas. It makes you drive all the way out there for that one party everyone is going to, it makes you stay for one more dance or worse one more drink (which never turns out to be one, does it?). But however many bad nights and bad decisions the FOMO leads to, it's always justified by those times it led to the best.night.ever.

The Fear Of Missing Out is a formidable foe and I've got a bad case this summer.

Many a night recently has found me pouring myself into bed shortly before dawn, wondering what I am doing up at such an hour. Novel writing and gym going are summarily abandoned the next day because I could not force myself to leave when I probably should have: I was either having too much fun or was certain the additional fun was right around the corner. Let's go eat at the diner, dance in the street or have one more drink at your place. Why? Why NOT? What's sleep compared to good times and good company?

If the FOMO has a natural habitat its New York City and when I was living there the FOMO was pretty much my spirit animal. If you went home early or worse, stayed in completely, you might miss a night that would become legend among your friends: a sighting of a reclusive artist, tequila shots with a movie star, a famous band popping up on a street corner to play a surprise show or simply one of those 'only in New York' nights that are the reason you moved there. And since New York is on all the time, you can never escape the FOMO, you can never honestly say 'I'll just stay in tonight, there's nothing going on.'

It was exhausting; sometimes a girl just needs Tivo and a glass of wine.

The FOMO and I have had some good times together but I can't let it run the show forever. Maybe just until Labor Day.

career path

I wrote for the Gloss today about a conversation I had with my youngest cousin who just graduated college about work, namely how to find something to do with your time that pays the bills and is reasonably fulfilling. My own career path since college has been a windy one and I haven't moved around half as much as some people my age. It used to be that people got a job after school and stayed in it until retirement. I can't say I know a single person over the age of twenty-six who has only worked for only one company. Is all this moving around a good thing? Does it help us value our own skills more or just value loyalty less?

Do you change it up or stay put?

talkin' bout freedom

                                                                          has cake whilst eating it


I'm starting a new job in September. Sort of. I am actually joining a collective of freelancers made up of four awesome book ladies who I know originally through the late, great Kim Ricketts. I'll have an office to go to, super fun co-workers to collaborate with, bitch to and brainstorm with and the semblance of structure and community I'd been missing since I've been working along these past months. BUT since I'm still a freelancer I get to keep my freedom.

And that's what's really been at the heart of it for me. I like work just fine, what I don't like is working on other people's terms and having to be in an office all day. For the most part, I've had fabulous bosses who have served as wonderful mentors. These ladies were essential to getting my career started and I am grateful to have so many places to go for good work advice, which I will never be so arrogant to think I don't need. But in the long run, life is too short to let someone else call the shots. I want to say where, when, who and how much; that's worth its weight in gold and 401ks.

What's most important to you at work?